The Dead Problems
by Martito Broodley
Summary: Simon believes wholeheartedly that his love is dedicated specifically to Clary. But then he tastes the blood of another Shadowhunter and finds himself in a whole 'nother abyss.
1. An introduction to love

If someone told you love was like sitting on top of a grassy hill, staring blissfully out onto the perfect night sky, they were lying— lying like a foul faker who has never tasted any sort of true love ever before. No, my friend, love is much more like being pushed off a hill and into the mud puddle from the pouring rain that has been haunting the skies ever since that person stepped into your life. A good example for this would be a certain vampire named Simon. Here was a boy who had a lovely sense of humour, a great body, and a perfect charm about him. Of course, he still had an awkward way of handling mostly everything, but that's beyond the point. The point, if we go back to it, was that Simon was in love with a girl called Clary. Clary, a handsome young Shadowhunter, was in love with another Shadowhunter; deciding to dismiss the young child of the night as a friend and no more. This little ice cream Sunday was topped off with a cherry named "incest".

You see, the boy Clary was in love with was none other than Jace Wayland, a magnificent sculpture of all anyone could hope to see in a man: rippling muscles, long wavy blond hair and a wonderful tendency of narcissism— and ironically Clary's brother. Simon would have loved to put his hands around the man's neck, squeeze the life from his perfect body; at least he did until about two weeks after he met him when he was trapped on a ship with his neck slit. Yet another ironic gesture from the heavens, as the man who had done it was Clary and Jace's father.

As Simon lay bleeding on the cold metal floor, several rivets sticking into his back, Simon began to think of all his regrets. After a number of mental shots at himself for not loving Clary enough, he settled on the issue of her brother. How Simon had never really found the right words to say to the guy, something like "Fuck off" or "She's your sister, you sick fuck" or some other rude sentence that included the word 'fuck'. But then, after dwelling on the thought for while, chewing it over, he realized he never actually hated Jace. Well, not as much as he'd thought. In fact, the lad was a laugh most of the time, and though Simon would never dare to admit it to anyone else, he came to the conclusion that he'd rather like to be Jace's friend. And as if God decided to bless the dying dead man, lo and behold: Jace stood in front of him. He wavered there for a second, deciding what exactly was laying before him. Then the golden boy dropped to his knees, picked Simon up into his lap and sat his hand atop his head. _Funny_, Simon thought half-consciously, _this is the exact situation I'd want Clary to be in with me. And yet, here I am with her dream man. _A few seconds past as Jace realized the vampire was still alive, and his neck was slit. He then, without hesitation, ripped his wrist open with a blade, and offered the blood to the boy in his lap.

The scarlet drops were like pure energy, and they shot through Simon's system like a bullet. Following their example, Simon burst into life, shooting onto the boy. He felt himself on Jace, pinning him with his extreme strength. He also noticed Jace wasn't struggling much in any way, shape or form. Simon leaned forward, his lips trembling as they passed over Jace's skin. The world seemed like it was moving overly slow, time dancing a salsa with reality. Finally his mouth found his neck, and he couldn't help but spread them as his hunger drew him forwards. A small voice spoke through all the chaos in his head, and it mumbled something as the fangs sprang forwards. _You want this. You always have, haven't you? _Simon dismissed it, pressing his teeth into the boy's flesh. The salty liquid rushed forward, coating his mouth in its thick sustenance. A wild emotion flew through Simon, a sort of triumph that bounded into being.

Suddenly, Simon couldn't stop himself as the blood flowed into his mouth; he needed more. Half of him was cheering himself on, as if he had finally made his first kill, and the act of drinking its blood was the ceremony. Simon silently wondered if Raphael had planted this thought into him somehow. The other half, however, was in trauma. He had just ripped through a prospecting friend's flesh, and was slowly taking his life. But there was one other opinion in his mind, the small one he'd brushed away earlier. It screamed that this was what he wanted, and what he had finally achieved; a chance to be in this proximity to Jace, his lips pressed against his neck. Now if he could only tear his fangs out and continue, providing him with as much life as he was taking. The voice screamed out, lashing about like a chicken with its head cut off. To his further horror, Jace began to pull him closer. Simon saw the light fading in his eyes, the satisfaction in his face pulling the vampire closer. Simon snapped his eyes closed as the blood finally reached his head, clearing the haze of his judgement. His fangs retreated into their sheathes and Simon launched himself backwards, now sitting upon Jace. A hand flew to his mouth, and he felt himself begin to cry. Jace sat panting underneath him for a minute or two, but what felt like an eternity to both of them.

That, dear readers, was the first time Simon felt a wavering in his emotion to that degree. He still, without a doubt, wanted Clary— the way a child might want a puppy; something to overwhelm their lives in joy and wash away the tears they might have felt in previous years. But now, the little voice that had shrieked to be heard in his attack spoke softly to him. The voice sat beside him in the subway, the corridors of his school, while he played video games, even when he was practicing with his band, currently titled "Lopsided Syringes". It told him there was more than one type of love. There was a soft love, and then there was the brutally intense take-me-now-on-the-floor kind of love. The latter, it told him, he felt for one Jace Wayland.

The Jewish vampire had decided sub-consciously many years ago that he loved Clary, and only Clary. He had promised himself he would only love her, no matter who else bounded into his life. However, as Simon pondered over the nature of the voice egging him on, he came to the realization that Jace had a way of taking down people's personal walls with his bare hands. Clary's promise she'd never have any sort of taboo relationship with anyone, for one. Alec's that he would never stray from the expected Shadowhunter path, for another. Simon, however, continued to dismiss the idea as far as he could; which really wasn't all that long, in retrospect.

A few weeks past, and suddenly, another chapter of the Valentine experience popped into being, pulling Simon through a portal into the country of the Shadowhunters. All in all, it wasn't a fantastic experience, considering it lead to Simon being thrown in a jail, a crazy man starving him to death, fighting in a war and finally being branded with a curse. At a low point in the action, however, Simon managed to find himself alone with Alec. He couldn't remember precisely when it was, but the memory was vivid.

"Alec."

"Mmm?"

"Was Jace your first love?"

Alec had at the time been drinking a cup of tea, which now seemed to be exploding from his nose.

"What?" Alec half whispered, half screamed. _(A fascinating paradox that is achievable by asking your parents what SNM is in a public setting.)_

"Sorry, it's just… how did you figure out you were gay?"

"Simon…" Alec sighed, and for a moment Simon was afraid he might just walk away. But instead he turned his gaze on the vampire, looking him over thoughtfully. "You know, he asked me about it a few days ago." Simon must have looked horrified because Alec sped up to continue. "But it was okay, because he helped me figure it all out. He told me I wasn't actually in love with him, but was just using him as an excuse to get away from a relationship with Magnus." Alec looked down, almost as if he were regretting something. "Which I am so thankful for, because without that push, I would never have had the courage to be with him." Alec pushed his chair back, and walked towards the door of the room.

"So you were never in love with him?" Simon inquired.

Alec looked back at the vampire, his eyes suddenly full of an emotion close to sorrow. "No, that part he got wrong. I was always in love with him." Any hope Simon had once had about escaping Jace's hold seemed to peel away at that moment. Simon felt his heart pounding, his breath leaving him. He was in love with Jace. Simon, a strictly straight gift to womankind was now attracted to Clary's not-quite brother (which had been found out some way along). Simon, at first, decided to handle it as best he could: date two women at once and hope to forget any doubt of his sexuality. Of course, he had to pick two of the top warriors he knew: Isabelle and Maia, who both, as it turned out, decided to pummel him when they found out about his relationship with the other.

Simon sat on the side of Clary's bathtub, drying blood from his broken nose. Looking in the mirror he saw monstrous bruises and cut, which were slowly healing. Luckily, apart from his pride, his emotional self was generally unharmed. He didn't love either of them, and he'd only done it as a distraction anyways. The problem was that he no longer had a wall between him and Jace. Which was also literal, as the one and only Jace opened the door of the bathroom. Simon silently cursed his God, and swore at him if he didn't send Jace Lightwood away this moment he would convert to Christianity.

"Hey, you alright?" Jace inquired, looking at him with half concern and half amusement.

"Save for not being able to feel my nose, yeah, pretty much." Simon mumbled.

"You really picked the wrong girls to mess with." Jace laughed.

"Yeah, well, guess I figured that out the hard way."

"No shit." Jace pulled a stool out from behind the door and sat down on it, gazing at Simon with an emotion Simon couldn't quite place. The vampire silently observed that the curls of Jace's hair fell on his face in a completely perfect way_. Not one stray strand anywhere,_ Simon thought as the little voice in him cheered like a twelve year old fangirl.

"What?" Simon said, feeling the blood rush to his cheeks.

"Why are you doing this?" Jace cocked his head sideways.

"I- What do you mean?"

"Don't be like that. You know what I mean. Why are you playing with your friends like this? Don't you care about them?" Simon could tell that Jace was trying to guilt the truth out of him, and he was scared because that technique always worked.

"Of course I do! Its just-" Simon shut his mouth quickly and glared at the floor.

"Just what? What in the name of the Angel could make you do something so idiotic?" Jace's voice was filled with a bitter tone, and he began to lean forward on his stool.

"Please, don't. I really don't want to talk about this with you." Simon heard his voice crack at the last word.

"Why? I thought we were friends now. Aren't I as good as anyone else? Or are you just using this stunt to get close to Clary? I know you're still in love with her, bloodsucker." Jace's eyes were now slits, and his voice had lowered into a growl. Simon was taken aback by the sudden hostility in his voice. In fear and sudden irritation Simon jumped to his feet.

"I am _not _doing this because of Clary, you dick! I'm doing it because of you!" Simon shot back at the boy. In a half second he realized what he'd said and paled in horror. _Don't ask about it. Please, please don't ask. Don't-_ but it was too late. As Simon bolted towards the door, Jace suddenly appeared in the way.

"What?" Jace practically whispered, holding a hand to Simon's shoulder. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing, just forget I said anything." Simon held his head down, knowing he would slip up further if he looked the boy in front of him in the face. The two boys stood for a few seconds, breathing heavily. Then Jace moved his hand to Simon's chin, tilting it up to look in his eyes. "What" Jace said, voice heavy with caution "was that supposed to mean?" He repeated. A violent urge rushed through the vampire, and suddenly he found himself parrying Jace's hand with precision and grace and lunging forward. It wasn't for a few seconds that Simon realized what he'd done. He lips were atop Jace's, and he felt the shudder of surprise ripple through the boy in front of him. As if a dam had been broken, the voice inside of Simon grabbed hold of his body and led him in a fierce dance. The vampire's arms swooped around the Shadowhunter, pulling his body closer. Jace didn't seem to be resisting as far as Simon could tell, so he continued hastily. His mouth grappled Jace's and he felt his tongue brush against his. Simon shuddered with pleasure, and his hand fluttered up Jace's back, pulling his shirt up and leaving his back bare. Simon finally pulled back, letting the other boy take a breath (even though Simon could have continued forever) and saw with horror the other boy's expression.

It looked like someone had punched Jace in the face. His face looked slightly scrunched, and pale like he was disgusted. It then dawned on Simon that he _was_ disgusted, and the tsunamis of regret flooded over the Jew. Jace continued to stare at the vampire with what looked like fascinated horror. He opened his mouth and closed it again, as though he'd forgotten how to speak.

"I- I'm so, so sorry." Simon felt the tears in his eyes, and bounded by Jace and into the hall. The last Jace saw was the boy running out the door. The slam seemed to echo through the halls and Clary appeared in the door. "What the hell just happened?" She cried, staring at the ruffled Jace. "His nose isn't broken anymore." Jace felt the words tumble out of his mouth, not being able to think of a wittier response. Clary glared at him with her female intuition. She decided better than to pry further into it.


	2. A very merry birthday

And so went the graceful confession of Simon; about as smooth as his confession to Clary had been, he noted as he looked back on it. The next month was spent hiding in his basement, avoiding the Lightwoods, and not answering his phone. Simon felt his metaphorical self tumbling down the damp grassy knoll, hurdling towards the mud puddle awaiting him. How he intended to keep up his charade, he had little to no idea. Fate, as it would have it, decided how to finish his antisocial streak; fate, and Clary's birthday party. For Simon to evade any other event might have passed as acceptable; but skipping Clary's party, for any reason, would be crossing the line. So it was that Simon emerged into the light of day, greeting the public world with a sigh. He knew exactly what to get Clary, as he always did and so his first destination of the day was the local EB Games. As usual, the store smelt like ham and Axe.

He quickly dashed to the PC section and picked up the latest Bethesda game. The whole ordeal only took about twenty minutes. As he passed through the city he glanced back over the golden towering buildings, and sighed. The smell of hotdogs and people drifted through the air, comforting the boy with its familiarity. For a moment it seemed like everything would be normal. Go back to being a simple world where he could be in love with Clary and hope that Jace would find someone else. A world where he could date multiple women, have a laugh with Shadowhunters, go to a Downworlder party and still call himself human. Inside, a part of him knew if he was hearing the situation from anyone else he might say something like "You know it's just your teenage hormones, right? The world doesn't end with you." _But the world might as well end with Jace _the vampire thought to himself.

"The party begins at 6 at the Institute. You better be there" was what Simon was told hastily over the phone by an eager sounding Clary. The phone had clicked off just as Simon was beginning to ask what he should bring. It was now five fifty five and Simon was standing in front of the church clutching a brown bag containing chocolate and Fall-Out Vegas. The boy sighed and looked down at his feet. "Tonight is about Clary, not you. Remember that Simon." He muttered to himself. It would take more will power than he thought he had to stick by the remark. Simon reached for the door handle, but just as his hand brushed the metal, it flew open. A blur of red hair rushed the vampire and he found himself in a tight embrace with Clary. "C-Clary!" Simon stuttered, as the girl released him from her grasp.

"Simon! Where on earth have you been? Why haven't you called us?" she cried, but Simon could hear the humour in her voice.

"Stop it, grandma. I have been using my valuable time productively playing Dead Rising and other activities that give a positive effect to all aspects of the physical being." Clary could no longer contain herself, and she burst out laughing. She pulled the boy in for another hug and tugged him inside the Institute.

The upstairs was dressed with streamers and balloons in all shapes and colours, and Simon had to stop himself with giggling at the childish nature of it all. "So? What do you think?" Clary motioned towards the decorations and did a twirl. She was wearing a brilliant green ball gown, and it twirled out like a garden when she spun. Simon smiled. "You look like a princess." This was obviously not the reaction Clary had expected, and she blushed fiercely. "Thanks." She mumbled.

The halls continued being decorated in bright colours, and while they walked down them Clary pestered Simon for details about the plot of video games she no longer had time to play. Simon began to hear the sounds of other people and music. Finally, Clary turned and led him into a tall room lit with green Will-o'-Wisps and IKEA vines. The walls were stacked with books. People and Downworlders bustled around, and Simon was reminded of Magnus's party. Only this one seemed far more peaceful. Simon looked up at the Will-o'-Wisps and leaned over to Clary.

"Aren't those kind of dangerous?" he muttered in hopes they could not hear him. "Yup, but Magnus used a Sanctuary spell." She said back, and seeing the delight in his smile folded her arms and cried "No! For the last time, this is not like DnD!"

"Liar. You just don't want to look like a nerd in front of your boyfriend." Simon couldn't stop his mouth, and the moment the words tumbled out he bit his tongue.

"Hey, that's right! What happened between you and Jace anyways? He never told me." Clary cocked her head sideways, like a puppy might when it wanted food.

"Uh, hey look! It's Alec! Let's go say hi to him." Simon pointed towards the frumpy looking boy, feeling his cheeks flush. Clary grabbed his arm and spun him around to face her.

"No, you tell me what's going on. You've had time to think, and I will not take 'no' for an answer." Her glare was steady now, and Simon knew it well from when they were little. It was the don't-you-dear-lie-to-me stare, and if he valued his life, he ought not to. "Clary… please, not today. Not on your birthday. Don't make me say it." Simon felt the tugging urge to run. "Simon— alright, but we're not done." Clary smiled, almost apologetically.

"Oh, and don't look now, but there's one of your exes at 12 o'clock." Clary made a nod to something behind him. It was Isabelle, in a long dark blue dress that fell around her ankles like a waterfall. She saw Clary staring and made to wave. However, upon seeing Simon, she did a dramatic twirl and stomped off to the food table.

"Well, at least she's not punching me." Simon shook his head and turned back to Clary.

"If you stay on this role, I might be the one hitting you." Clary smiled warmly, "Anyways, I won't keep you. Go talk to people. Hey, I think Raphael is here." Clary smirked at Simon, probably for the lack of ability to wink.

"I'm not sure I want to know what you're implying." Simon glared at Clary, grinning. Clary giggled and hugged him again.

"Okay, okay. Go patch things up with them. I believe in you." Clary turned and pranced off into the crowd. Simon sighed and gazed after her. Despite everything he was still so in love with her. The boy turned around to find himself blocked by a tall dark figure wearing a rainbow trench coat and a baby blue tank top. Simon looked up in surprise at the warlock.

"Hello again, little vampire. How are you doing this fine evening?" Magnus smiled at the boy. Simon could tell he had no interest in how he was doing.

"Oh, you know, the usual. What's up?" Simon tried his best to not let his nervousness seep into his voice, not to much avail.

"The general: slaving away under my boyfriend's rule. Hey, on that subject, having any teenage crises lately?" Magnus put his hand on his hip and made a face that genuinely said he only wanted to get this over with.

"W-why do you ask?" Simon was now petrified. It was one thing to tell a friend he trusted and knew from childhood (even if her boyfriend was the one involved) but to tell someone like Magnus, well, was just over the uncomfortable line. However, knowing Magnus, he already knew the problem and it was probably easier just to get his advice on the subject. He knew it, and yet he just couldn't put his faith in someone who had let him turn into a rat. Simon grimaced at the memory.

"Well, it's quite possible a certain sexy, young, poorly-dressed man is worried for your sanity. Or perhaps he's finally growing some sort of intuition. Oh, don't get me wrong. He has the best intuition in what counts." Magnus winked at Simon.

"Gah, okay. Enough information on that" Simon blushed and turned his head towards Magnus's pointed shoes "And no! I have no teenage crises, none whatsoever. Especially since I'm a vampire who has a ruddy magical mark permanently etched into my forehead." Simon spat out.

"Oh, now, now. We've already dealt with all that. Well, someone else, probably; someone who cares. Have you no other issues? I am a," Magnus paused, puzzling over some numbers "246 year old warlock. I have many an experience that I've dealt with." Magnus stared down at the pale boy. _So not his age. _Simon smirked internally.

"No! Just… if you could ask Alec to ask Isabelle to calm down a bit, that'd be lovely." Simon sighed. He couldn't bring himself to say it. Magnus stood in front of him, lingering on his words for a few moments, before he finally agreed and went back to his Shadowhunter. Simon watched between Downworlders as the warlock told Alec of the results. Alec seemed disappointed, but the crowd blocked his view of the two before he could see the conclusion.

It was another few minutes of lingering in the crowd before Simon finally found his way to the back of the room. There were tall round tables lining the area and Simon swiftly found one to fall onto. The music rocked through Simon's brain, stirring the stress about. The emotions took so much energy to deal with and he felt himself falling to sleep. The whole scenario was so intense it almost made him forget what he had been originally afraid of confronting. The vampire closed his eyes and rested his head in his arms, feeling the comforting touch of cotton over his tired eyelids. He felt himself drifting off into another world when a hand fell softly on his head.

"Clary?" Simon muttered and pulled his head up. A beautiful boy in an undone suit top stood before him, his golden curls falling perfectly around his head.

"No, Jace. Do I really look that much like a woman? I mean, I've gotten it before, but really-" The boy frowned down at the boy, but before he could finish his sentence Simon had shot up from his seat. Simon now clearly remembered his reason.

Simon opened his mouth to speak, make up an excuse, stick the blame on anything, but nothing came to his mind. Jace looked over the boy and sighed.

"Simon… can we talk this over? Preferably somewhere where I can hear you?" Jace said loudly over the blaring music. Simon would have loved to know how to turn into a bat at this moment. He nodded, and followed after the angel.

It took them a few minutes to get out of the room, and find their way into a part of the Institute that was both deserted and quiet. Eventually, Jace located a room that fit the criteria and he sat down in an old leathery chair. The room was fairly large and barren, with only two chairs and a large window. Simon closed the door softly and leaned on it, staring at the boy in the chair.

"So, where to start?" Jace muttered, gazing at his hands.

"I-" Simon began, and seeing Jace look up felt his heart have a seizure "I just… um… i-it started on the boat." It was an honest answer, and Simon felt like he was going to vomit. All his of body wanted him to pounce on the angel and snog his face off; all his instincts told him that Jace would probably punch his teeth out if he did. His emotions were calling out all sorts of things but the general consensus was he was a humiliated loser. Jace looked at him, and then swiftly shifted his gaze to the broad window.

"Simon— I'm with Clary. I love her, and I know you do too. I would never do anything to hurt her. You understand that, right?" Simon wasn't sure if he meant he didn't want to beat the vampire up for fear of upsetting her, or if he meant he was interested in the boy but would never date him because he didn't want to distress her. He highly doubted the latter could be true.

"I know. I would never have done that, I don't even know why— it just happened. I'm sorry." Simon closed his eyes, feeling the insides dampen. _God, what happened to my manliness?_

"No, don't be sorry. Just know nothing will come of it, and accept it." Jace stood up, and for a brief second Simon swore he saw regret in Jace's eyes. _How do you think I could ever accept that? No, I won't accept it! No! Stop him Simon! Stop him! _The voice was screaming in his head, battering his skull with harsh emotions.

"Yah." Simon whispered, as Jace walked past him into the hall. It was a few seconds before Simon realized he was alone. He sat down in one of the chairs, letting his head drop into his hands. He felt like he'd been hit by a train. "Fuck."


	3. Soup and a Mango

Hello people who read this story! I'd like to mention that for this story, as it's earlier written chapters were written before I had further read into the books, that there are some plot holes! For one, the girlfriend situation will have happened… earlier, and also Simon can deal with speaking of and being in holy places. Like the Institute. Any other ones I apologize for, but just take it as kind of a different reality.

Love. Love is wonderful, beautiful and otherwise glorious. Those who have fallen under it's spell tend to find this, unless the situation of the attraction is inhospitable or otherwise difficult. There are one-sided loves, two-sided loves and sometimes even three-sided loves! There are times where the victims may fall in love at first sight, or other times it takes years for it to develop. Love is endless. It comes in any shape or size. If you wanted to look at it from a scientific view you would see that it's a drive in animals and humans. It has three stages: lust, attraction, and attachment. The chemical drive behind these forces is immense, and mixed with pheromones tends to be an irresistible part of life. Always haunting the back of people's brains, taking over in the least likely and logical scenarios; love is always there. A driving force.

Now, our beloved Simon. Yes, yes, him. What seemed like a simple, logical sound thing like love now haunts him devotedly. So what is the answer to these problems that make his life a living hell? Denial, of course!

Upon the result of Simon's conversation with Jace Lightwood at Clary Fray's birthday party the young vampire stormed from Institute, heading with violent speed to a nearby park to cool down. While sitting on a cold swing he had a brilliant idea as to how to deal with the situation at hand: not deal with it at all, and pretend it never happened! _Wonderful _he thought to himself, _I'll never mention it again and settle with hating the guy! My mind is probably just going through a faze, trying to replace Clary, and so it randomly picked Jace! No problem._

Denial. A sensual idea, and an amusing one at that. In the days that followed he encountered a high ranking vampire, met a boy, messed with his mother's head and moved in with the boy (name being Kyle).

It was upon walking home one night, and being viciously attacked by men in hoods, that the great Jace Lightwood appeared in Simon's life once again. If vampires could tell temperatures, Simon would have known that it was a mildly cold night, but as it was he could not feel anything besides the feeling that something was wrong. Suddenly, a white van pulled up behind him, and two thugs in gray hoodies carrying weapons stumbled out. They resembled the mugger that had attacked him to a tee (which had happened not all that long ago, if you haven't bothered to read the books). Before he could do much else two things happened. One, Jace jumped from presumably a roof, landing on one of the offenders, and the other attacked Simon. This proved to be an unfortunate choice of actions, seeing as he was torn to pieces then turned to salt as a result of Simon's curse.

The next thing Simon could remember was Jace standing above him, shock and worry clouding his voice. "What was that? Simon!" Words fell from the vampire's mouth, but he couldn't hear them. The shock of what had happened was still biting at Simon's mind.

Simon was pulled from his state by the feeling of having a warm body beside him. The vampire looked over, and it finally clicked that the person who had aided him was his Jace. _No, not my Jace. A Jace. The Jace. Why is it always __**the**__ Jace? _His mind mumbled to itself. "Are you okay? You don't look so good…" Jace put his hands on Simon's shoulders. The feel of his strong hands was like a slap in the face. Simon bolted to his feet. "I- it wasn't my fault!" Jace stared at him. "Can I crash at your place?" The words echoed about Simon's head before he could absorb them. "What?" Simon heard his voice crack a little and cursed himself for it. "I think I need to watch you. You seem to be being hunted." Jace pointed at the pile of salt as he stood up. "What? No I'm not!" Simon's panic was growing. Jace raised his eyebrow. Simon sighed, trying to calm hiself down. "So you want to look after me, like a bodyguard or something?" Simon laughed a bit at the thought. But Jace was staring at him, completely serious. "Well, yeah." Like it was something completely normal. _He does realize I kissed him, right? No, that doesn't matter anymore. _Simon shook his head to clear the thought. "Fine."

Once they arrived at the apartment it was like Simon was floating in a dream. _Why is this happening now? Jeez. _He knew it didn't do him any good to find bliss in the situation, but it was so hard to turn off. Jace inspected the place, and concluding it was satisfactory he slumped onto the couch. Simon looked the boy over. He was still as beautiful as ever, and he mentally slapped himself for noticing. But he also picked up that Jace's eyes were dark, and he looked overall unhealthy.

"Are you alright? You look… sick. When was the last time you ate?"

"Uh, yesterday I think."

"Oh, brilliant. This doesn't have anything to do with you and Clary, does it? If you don't mind me asking." Simon turned away from the boy and walked to the kitchen.

"No, you're right. I do mind you asking."

Simon pulled open the fridge, inspecting for any food that might be lurking in its depths. When he closed the door Jace had moved to inspect the plants Kyle was growing. "Hey, there's no food in here, so let's go shopping. What do you want?" He called over to the angel. "I don't know… soup and a mango?" The boy called back. "Soup and a mango... alrighty then! Let's go."

The store was fairly empty, due to the time of night, but there were still enough people to eye the two boys that it felt uncomfortable. At one point Simon turned to find two girls giggling about Jace. One went up to him and gave him her number. Simon had never wanted to punch a girl so hard. Once they had gone the vampire went back to the cart, soup in hand. "What did they want?" Simon said, staring down at the cart. "I think she said she wanted to touch my mango." Jace was now inspecting the soup. Simon flushed. "Time to go." Simon pushed the cart with such force that Jace, who was leaning on it, nearly fell over.

The city was calmer at night, for the most part, and as the boys walked through deserted streets, Simon reviewed his situation. The vampire knew being around Jace made him jumpy with glee, and Simon contented with telling himself that it was only because he was… a good friend. Or someone who made him feel powerful to be around. There had to be a good reason somewhere in his mind. He sighed. The orange lamplight's romantic feel wasn't helping anything. A woman's laugh filled the silent void of the street, and suddenly Jace sighed. "Simon, I've been meaning to ask, but why are you attracted to me?" Simon nearly fell over. "I- I- What? What are you talking about?" Jace stopped. Simon turned around slowly, holding his tongue. Jace breathed in, closing his eyes. When he spoke, it was on the breath out, and with careful choice of words. "You kissed me. You said it started on the boat. Why?" Simon took a step back, hoping to coax the boy into walking. It wasn't working. "I was, um, dealing with some things back then. Don't worry, I'm not… there anymore." Jace still wasn't moving. "Simon, don't lie, it doesn't suit you." Panic flooded over the vampire, feeling as if a chain had fallen over his neck. "Jace, um… did I mention I have a flatmate? Cause I do. His name is Kyle! You should meet him, c'mon." Simon turned and began stalking towards his building.

Jace moved with such speed even Simon didn't hear him move. Suddenly Simon was against the brick wall, two strong hands holding back his shoulders. "Jace, what-" but his complaint was never voiced, as Jace's lips covered his. Shock was the first emotion that shot through the vampire. Then joy and the urge to faint pooled through. Now, Simon was no expert on kissing, but he knew for a fact that Jace was holding quite a bit back, his lips gentle on his own. Simon resisted the urge to pull him closer once more. The passion Simon had to contain was immense, but luckily he managed to keep some sense about him. He knew Jace was only testing him, teasing him probably. Mocking him and any sort of pride he had left. _Oh, what the hell. _Simon felt a mental snap, and suddenly he was grabbing Jace. His hands glided to the back of his head, snaring countless locks of golden hair. Their mouths were gliding together flawlessly, a state of perfection. Jace hands moved to hold either side of Simon's face, finally pulling them apart. Both of them breathed heavily, Simon doing it mostly to regain sanity, before Jace gave a little snort of laughter. "Liar."

The rest of the walk back to Simon's house was in dead silence, Jace looking smug, Simon completely defeated. Upon entering the house Simon quickly heated up the bowl of soup, and put it in front of the boy who was already seated at the table. Simon stared out the window as Jace spooned the liquid into his mouth. About halfway through the meal Kyle walked through the door. He walked into the kitchen, and stopped dead once he spotted Jace. "Well, well Simon. You didn't mention your roommate was a werewolf." The rest of the night flew by, Kyle and Jace fighting over who should be Simon's bodyguard with heated conversation.

"I'm going to sleep." Simon called to them over their bickering, and he stepped into his barren room. Turning to shut the door he found Jace already stepping through the opening. "Quite a space you've got here. Minimalist. I like it." Jace said in a friendly way, smiling at the walls. "What are you doing?" Fright was clouded Simon's voice to his horror. "Thought you might want some company." Jace winked at him. "I hate you so much. Please get out." Simon turned away. "You don't really get this whole bodyguard thing, do you?" Jace shut the door behind him. There was a silence, then Simon turned back to face him. "Why are you doing this? I don't understand what you get out of torturing me. Oh wait, let me guess. You have something going on with Clary and need to take it out on someone. Namely, me." Simon scoffed, crossing his arms angrily.

Jace glanced at Simon with something that he swore was desperation, and then he looked down. "In your own words 'I am _not _doing this because of Clary'. You're not really a dick though, so I'll leave that part out." Jace smiled at his floor, raising his head slightly. Simon breathed in, a habit he had yet to rid himself of. "Well then, why are you doing it? I'd love to pretend that everything never happened, but you seem determined to make that impossible." At that Jace looked up, his face solemn. "Do you think it's possible for someone to be in love with two people? At once?" It was said meekly, but the tone was solemn and deep.

Simon thought about it. He had had two relationships at once, and though he wasn't in love with either of the women, he'd still been attracted to them. And attraction eventually led to love, as it had with Clary. "Yeah, I'd say so. But what do I know? And that has nothing to do with why you're being so cruel."

"Actually, yeah. It does. Sadly, it really, really does." Frustration was leaking into Jace's voice. It scared Simon a bit. "Now, Simon, I don't fall for people easily. At least, I never had before I met Clary. So many people wanted me, none would do. I was sure that once I met Clary that I had met my soul mate." Simon felt his spirit drop a bit, but his curiosity was still riotous. "And I still am, believe me, but… just not exactly soul as in sole." Jace's eyes now fixed Simon's, waiting for a response. Simon wasn't sure he was hearing right. His heart would have been in overdrive if it had had any drive at all. Simon opened his mouth, willing himself to say something, anything. Nothing came out but a kind of whimper. They stared at each other, and Jace began to step forwards, raising his arm to the vampire's shoulder. The moment he touched his skin, Simon felt his head clear. The vampire jumped back, and slammed against the wall. "W-what?" He yelled, voice cracking. Jace sighed.

"You, you moron. I'm in love with you." Simon's legs gave out, and he slid to the floor. "No you're not. You hate me. You hate me so much, and you love Clary to the ends of the earth." He was aware his voice was shaking. Jace sank to his knees, shaking his head. "I thought I hated you. I hated you and Clary, and you for being with her, but later, looking back at it, I realize that I despised her for being with you as well." Jace moved his hand to rest on Simon's knee. "Simon, I-" Simon could no longer stand the situation. Without fully understanding what he was doing he backhanded Jace across the face. He obviously wasn't expecting it, or he would have stopped the attack. The angel fell back, and Simon jumped up to stand above him. "Jace, you're not in your right mind. I can see that, and I don't want you to do anything you'll regret, so I want you to leave." Jace stared up in disbelief, opening his mouth to voice an objection. "**Now.**" Simon growled, feeling his rage building. As stubborn as Jace was, he knew better then to try to convince the boy anymore.

After Jace had left, Kyle stuck his head through the now-open door. "Hey, what was that about? I thought he was set on being your bodyguard." Simon just stared at him, then shook his head. "I'm going to sleep now." Kyle slowly nodded, and pulled the door closed with a little creak.


End file.
